Staying Close When You’re Far Away
Modern life has changed dramatically in just the last ten years or so. In fact, it’s hard to imagine a time without smartphones, Wi-Fi, Google Maps, and movies and television on demand.
And this ever-changing, fluid existence creates a unique demand on the workforce. Not only do we need a computer and a reliable Wi-Fi connection, but many of us must relocate to cities with a growing technology sector that keeps employment consistent and housing affordable.
The downside is that relocation separates us from the ones we love most. It’s not hard to see how divorced parents and their children can be greatly affected by the new requirements of the modern world.
When divorced parents live in different states, it’s important that they have a long-distance visitation schedule. For multi-state coparenting to be successful, parents have to be willing to compromise and remember that what they’re doing may be inconvenient for them, but it’s in the best interests of their child.
Here are a few things to think about when making up an out-of-state visitation schedule with your former spouse:
- Will your child be flying? If so, does your child need airline assistance? Who is responsible for booking the flight? Will you be splitting the costs with your former spouse? If a spouse prefers to apply airline rewards to help with costs, how will that even out?
- If the child is traveling by car, how will you split up fuel costs, or hotel rooms? Where is the rendezvous point? Equidistant, or one-sided enough that cost and time should be factored in to the equation?
- Might it be simpler for the out-of-state parent to travel to the child? If so, what about hotel accommodations for that parent, and the travel costs?
- Will the visit take place during the school year? Maybe the visit carries over into time when school is in session. How does this affect the child’s education, travel and lodging, cost and time?
- Can the child’s grandparents assist in any way? What about mobile apps, such as Skype, to provide more time between child and parent? Does your child have or need a phone?
Some of these considerations seem obvious, but it always helps to write them down and share them with your ex. It will also help to get legal advice from an experienced out-of-state custody attorney. Huguenor Mattis, A.P.C., has been serving San Diego families for over 35 years. You can reach us at (858) 458-9500 for a free initial consultation about your situation.